Woman sneaks vegetables into picky 31-year-old boyfriend's meals, gets offended when he finds out and protests: 'I think he's being dramatic'

Author image for Ally Perry
Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Dec 21, 2024 6:00 PM EST

I can't lie, while I understand that there can be legitimate reasons for it I do get annoyed by picky eaters. When it comes to cooking for other people, I always try to accommodate the preferences of others but when catering to certain individuals, it can get tiring. I can't imagine having to share food with a partner who has a much more limited palate than mine, but many people do.

This is something that one woman was struggling with when it came to her boyfriend. He didn't like eating vegetables, and she worried about his health so she snuck them into the recipes that she cooked for him. Eventually, he found out and was angry at her for deceiving him, although he liked the food she had cooked that had secret vegetables in it. It's fair to say that Redditors were split about who was in the wrong here.

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  • 01
    www
    via Tina Dawson

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA for sneaking vegetables into my boyfriend's food because he "doesn't like eating green things"?
    via Glam_Glitterx
  • 03
    My boyfriend is 31 years old and refuses to eat vegetables. He says they're gross and "ruin the texture of everything". He'll literally pick every piece of spinach out of a salad or scrape the veggies off of pizza. I've tried to get him to eat them, but he insists he doesn't need them because he takes a multivitamin.
    via Glam_Glitterx
  • 04
    The thing is I cook most of our meals, and I want him to eat healthier. So I started sneaking vegetables into his food without telling him. I'll blend spinach into sauces, finely dice carrots into meat dishes, or mix zucchini into muffins. He never noticed and happily ate everything I made.
    via Glam_Glitterx
  • 05
    This went on for months until last week when I accidentally left the blender out with spinach still in it. He put two and two together and flipped out. He said I betrayed his trust and treated him like a child. I told him I only did it because I care about his health, and it's not like he noticed or hated the food until he found out. He said that's not the point, and I had no right to "trick" him.
    via Glam_Glitterx
  • 06
    I think he's being dramatic because I wasn't forcing him to eat veggies he could taste he enjoyed the food until he realized what was in it. But now he's calling me a "control freak" for not respecting his "dietary restrictions". AITA for sneaking veggies into his food? I felt like I was just trying to help him, but maybe I should've just minded my business.
    via Glam_Glitterx

    It is clear that neither the Redditor nor her boyfriend want to see each other's perspective here. There is no denying that it is frustrating to be expected to cook for a fussy eater, and a multivitamin probably doesn't cancel out the negative nutritional impact of not eating vegetables. At the same time, though, it could be argued that it is deceptive to deliberately put something in somebody's food when they avoid it. It would not be fair to add meat to a meal for a vegetarian.

  • 07
    rossimac007 Sorry but what parts of the salad is he eating if he doesnt eat vegetables? Also, NTA. Your bf is acting like a child
    via rossimac007
  • 08
    Glam Glitterx OP Mostly grilled chicken and quinoa, sometimes I would try to add some fruit, but he's very picky with fruits as well so I gave up on making salads for him a while ago.
    via Glam_Glitterx
  • 09
    MidorriMeltdown Mostly grilled chicken and quinoa That's not a salad. That's a meat and a seed.
    via MidorriMeltdown
  • 10
    idontevenlikethem That's not a boyfriend, it's three birds in a trench coat.
    via idontevenlikethem
  • 11
    WhatWasThatAbout Three toddlers in a trench coat
    via WhatWasThatAbout
  • 12
    ToastetteEgg ESH. He is acting like a child, and you're feeding him like he's a toddler. Just stop going to all that trouble, fix veggies for yourself and let him be. Either accept him for the way he is or move on.
    via ToastetteEgg
  • 13
    rrhunt28 This was my take. I personally am somewhat picky and won't eat most vegetables. Most of it is a texture thing and probably mostly psychological. One example is I don't mind the taste of onions, but hate onions in stuff. So when I cook I just use onion powder. Also there are some things like certain soups that technically have onion, but they are diced very small and then cooked till they fall apart. So I don't mind eating it. But putting stuff in a grown man's food and hiding it is wron
    via rrhunt28
  • 14
    fretfulpelican So a woman is expected to cook for her partner, and on top of that expected labor has to adhere to restrictions, not even allergies but personal tastes, and when she finds a way to accommodate those personal tastes in a way that provides nutrition for their SHARED MEALS, she's somehow the a h le? Literally could not be me. He can cook his own meals.
    via fretfulpelican
  • 15
    HoldFast02 That's a fair enough resolution, IMO. "This is what I'm cooking. If you want to eat it, I'll make enough for the both of us. If not, you can cook your own dinner. Choose now.
    via HoldFastO2
  • 16
    NotaMember11 He can cook his own meals if he doesn't like what you cook. (Except he did like what you cooked.)
    via NotaMember11
  • 17
    throwawaylalilulelo If he's that committed to avoiding vegetables, then he can cook his own meals. OP is not his personal chef, and she was doing it out of love and concern for his health. NTA
    via throwawaylalilulelo
  • 18
    DianaaMolly He definitely needs to step up and take responsibility for his own meals if he's so picky. It's not like OP was serving him unpalatable dishes-she was trying to help!
    via DianaaMolly
  • 19
    Normal-Height-8577 You can do bad things with good intentions. OP has broken his trust. She could have asked him to seek help for his sensory issues. She could have asked him to test two different recipes - one normal, and one with added veggie mush and see if he could tell the difference. She could have suggested ways of managing his aversion. She could have broken up with him. Instead, she went to extreme lengths to hide what she was doing with his food, and yeah, she treated him like a child.
    via Normal-Height-8577
  • 20
    INVISIBLENINJACHICK YTA. He said he doesn't want to eat them. Don't try and sneak them in. Just break up with this child unless you're really into being a mother for a 31 year old man.
    via INVISIBLENINJACHICK
  • 21
    RaspberryAnnual4306 YTA, but only to yourself for dating a grown man that has to be tricked into eating vegetables.
    via RaspberryAnnual4306
  • 22
    Zealousideal_Till683 You get a lot of comments on this sub saying things like "I am tired of being his Mummy." But many women seem determined to put themselves in that place. If your "help" was in any way appropriate it wouldn't need to be secret. No, what your boyfriend eats isn't your business. Yes, you are a control freak. YTA.
    via Zealousideal_Till683
  • 23
    Shdfx1 She is indeed treating him like a child, and she's his mommy who knows better. Of course he should eat his vegetables, but he's a grown man, and it's his decision what to eat. She should have just told him that it's a serious turn off for her that he won't eat vegetables, and they can decide where to go from there.
    via Shdfx1
  • 24
    ResolveResident118 ΥΤΑ. Hiding things in people's food will always make you an AH. I'm similar, though not as bad as your boyfriend, in that I don't like a lot of vegetables. To get around this, I do exactly what you're doing. The difference is a matter of consent.
    via ResolveResident118
  • 25
    yeahoooookay NTA because you did it out from a caring place. He's not appreciating the love behind your deception. It didn't hurt him, so he should say, "Thank you for caring enough to do this." Edit: His dietary restrictions were due to taste and texture. You adjusted your recipes to change that. He didn't notice. What's the big deal? Since he's so upset about it, stop doing it. There's no point in going out of your way to add extra steps to your recipes if he's not ok with it. I'd also cook wh
    via yeahoooookay
  • 26
    Old_Inevitable8553 YTA. You might mean well but at the end of the day, it's not your decision to make. If your boyfriend doesn't want to eat something, even if his behavior comes off as being childish, then he has the right to say no.
    via Old_Inevitable8553
  • 27
    Bold-Belle2 NTA. Guy is childish. You practically used a different "recipe" and it worked, he ate everything fine, its not like you poisoned him with something he's allergic to, nothing wrong with that.
    via Bold-Belle2

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boyfriend aita cooking deception relationships fussy picky food reddit thread Reddit picky eater
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